2022 miscellaneous end-of-year post

[permutative]

sorry this is literally so long for no reason but please bear with me... i guess.

this post includes: favorite media, hobby roundup, updated skincare/makeup routine, and goals/intentions for next year!

MEDIA (LISTENING)
>> MUSIC
this year was the first time that i went to concerts and i think that really gave me a different way to experience music/a different perspective on what music can be like if that makes sense… like music just sounds so much better in person than through my apple earbuds/airpods. I didn't listen to that much music for most of the year though – like my spotify got disconnected from my lastfm and i didn't care enough to reconnect it until like late november when i started getting more into music again TT_TT also ngl i think having sony headphones also altered my music experience so much like it's just simply so immersive and addictive i'm MUSICLUVR AGAIN…

concert rundown:

glaive (ft aldn / midwxst) – san francisco
>> FIRST CONCERT EVER!!! glaive is really such a sweet kid (crazy to me that i went to a concert headlined by a kid born in 2005 T__T) and he got emotional halfway through the concert because i think that was one of the biggest concerts he had played up to that point. i really enjoyed the concert but wish i went with someone who actually liked his music to the extent that i did (u will find that this is a common theme…)

tkay maidza / victoria monet / (amine)
>> this was for my school's spring music festival… tkay maidza was lowkey not that good live and victoria monet was amazing!!! left before amine showed up because i was tired and had just recovered from covid

alexa / golden child / brave girls – nyc
>> FREE KPOP CONCERT IN CENTRAL PARK WITH MISS CRYS <3 everything about this was kind of insane like it was so hot out and alexa was… mid and then golden child were perfect (so glad that i actually knew their discography decently well due to 2021 soobun propaganda) and then brave girls were Actually Perfect… seeing rollin live simply made my day! and for free!!! trying to find the end of the line to enter the concert took years off of my life though

chase atlantic – nyc
>> me standing at this concert realizing that i'm simply chase atlantic fan and know all of their songs by heart… i was literally just there being like "omg this next song is gonna be so good" when the first few notes of every song played kjKADHSJG i felt like the openers went on for too long though and i didn't really enjoy the style of the openers n__n the venue was also gorgeousss i think the rooftop at pier 17 is so pretty and perfect for summer outdoor concerts

enhypen – anaheim
>> me: "this was an ok concert!" / van: "actually this is the worst kpop concert i've ever been to" (*$&*(@%&... well this was certainly something i experienced and i think it would have been a much better experience if i went to a later date but that's what we get for going to their first us tour date or whatever T__T the overall trip to ucsb was sooo fucking fun though and van was an amazing host and i hope to explore more of socal in the future

baek yerin – berkeley
>> pov it's the week before finals week and i'm going to a concert that's 40 miles away for an artist whose music i find PROFOUNDLY BORING?!?! still divided on whether going to the concert was worth it but hey at least i got to see square (2017) live… yerin baek is also funny as fuck. i was so bothered by the random drunk men in the audience shouting cringey things at baek yerin tho and also even though the venue was small i had the worst view ever and could barely make out her face… would not recommend

brakence (ft jane the remover) – boston
>> can't tell if this is recency bias or something but ahhh i enjoyed this concert so much… i think it's also just because the timing was insanely perfect. i discovered one song of brakence's in august (ty discover weekly <3) but didn't really check out his music beyond that until one of my friends was like "oh shit his album came out it's good" in late november. i ended up looping the hypchrondriac album incessantly during the last three weeks of the quarter and then during finals week i bit the bullet and bought tickets to a show n__n the tickets were cheap and i basically knew every song from the new album by heart so there was no way i wasn't going to enjoy the concert even a little bit. like yeah it was annoying that the crowd was a bunch of white drunk gay men moshing in the center and people were a little smelly but BRAKENCE WAS SO GOOD (by that i mean he sounded exactly like his songs) (i can't tell if he was actually good or if i just love his music so much that i enjoyed it) (anyways) also this was the first time that i actually enjoyed an opener's music LMAO T__T stream movies for guys or whatever

idrk how to go over my 2022 music in a very comprehensive way like there are just so many random tangents in my listening patterns… i remember loving cvlte so much and being into that very specific brand of japanese electropop-rock but now im just like n__n cuz it reminds me of someone i hate and i remember overlistening to enha discography before the concert and i… yeah. lol. just don't even know how to properly categorize what i've enjoyed

just want to say that something about the brakence album reallyyy spoke to me… i don't even think the lyrics are particularly good but sometimes the ridiculousness of it + the overblown production was just so soulhitting in the best way possible. one of my fav moments of the quarter was when i left my math final, the last exam of the semester, and listened to sauceintherough while biking back to my dorm. something about the I BE LOOKIN ALL STYLISH/SHE SAID HER BOYFRIEND'S BI AND HE TRYNA FUCK/I DON'T GOTTA CONTRIVE IT literally got to me… the world was so beautiful in that moment…

resolutions:

• actually listening to my discover weekly every week because i find at least 2-3 songs i'm obsessed with every time i give it a try… the issue is that i'll literally forget to check it for a month in between
• BRING BACK MONTHLY PLAYLISTS!! i miss making them and i feel like they were really good for me to keep track of my changes in listening patterns
• stop listening to chris brown idk

>> PODCASTS
why do i include this section. i still listen to the new york times popcast which is crazy like why have i been listening to this podcast since 8th grade… don't worry about it… but also it's nice to discover random new songs/music from nyt music critics. definitely wouldn't appreciate drill rap as much as i do currently without jon caramanica espousing SHAKE IT BY KAY FLOCK as his soty or whatever

MEDIA (WATCHING)
i don't even want to talk about tv shows and movies from this year like yeah i did watch f4 thailand and attorney woo youngwoo and young royals season 2 but ??? i feel like there wasn't a show that truly gripped me… don't get me started on my lack of movie watching. i did go see the new avatar movie in the theaters and yes it was the worst thing to ever happen to me.

i am looking forward to some of the gmmtv shows (especially 10 years ticket!) but idk how much i care overall T__T i tried to start watching never let me go and was impressed by the overall production value and stuff but one of the actors was truly so stiff/awkward…

>> YOUTUBE
if u know anything about me you'll know that i'm weirdly invested in my fav microinfluencers <3 just a brief rundown:

• jedcal: the most beautiful man alive, he's kind of boring but i like how cinematic his videos are (he really uses his drones or whatever) and he keeps his videos short so i enjoy it
• ur mom ashley: mmm idk how much i Like Her as like a person these days but her videos are so consistently predictable and satisfying to me it's just about being able to passively watch someone else partake in consumerism yk…
• isaasung: i love her style but more than that i like how she likes FOOD and will include very good restaurants/cooking in her videos <3
• zoenotzoey: i also watch her vlogs to passively see someone else partake in consumerism… idk why but it's so satisfying to see someone else eat good food and buy cute things. also tbt when i used to try out the cafes she'd go to in nyc
• kaavikiwi: me one day googling INDIAN YOUTUBERS because i want to follow more south asian social media content. anyways i don't watch her that often because umm idk how much i fw the fashionova aesthetic but sometimes her videos will be recommended for me and they're kind of fun

also for shorts i've watched every doobydobap short in existence but i simply cannot tolerate her personality for more than 2 minutes. also i still watch elliot choy sometimes but i don't really want to talk about it

MEDIA (READING)
i'm like ??? did i actually read books this year?? i think i probably read around 10 but to be completely honest i just read a shit ton of graphic novels T__T part of it was because i took a class on graphic novels though!! i'm just going to list everything to be comprehensive though since i haven't updated my storygraph in ages

• the power of habit: why we do what we do in life and business
• no-no boy by john okada
• lighter than my shadow by katie green
• the girl from the sea by molly knox ostertag
• making comics by scott mccloud
• march: book one by john lewis
• flying kites by stanford graphic novel project
• guantanamo voices, edited by sarah mirk
• stone fruit by lee lai
• messy roots by laura gao
• *the idiot by elif batuman

*finished it on january 2nd 2023 but still counting it as a 2022 read

wow this is honestly depressing only three of these books are not graphic novels *(@&% honestly this shows how little i read… maybe i needed a little break after reading so many books the year before though idk. tbf i do read a shit ton of ao3 fanfiction but ummm making it a goal next year to read more books that AREN'T GRAPHIC NOVELS (*&$(%*@ btw unlike most of the people i know i actually kind of enjoyed the idiot… maybe it's cuz my sense of humor is shit and i find elif batuman funny + maybe it's because the physical sensation of having a crush/being hopelessly into this person is described fairly well idk.

oh and wrt fic-reading… ummm… i really don't want to do an ao3 wrapped or whatever but let's just say i spend a lot of time reading bad fanfic from enhypen (heejay, jaywon, or heejake), ateez (seongjoong), harry potter (drarry), and kinnporsche (vegaspete). i can probably go on for ages but let me just list some things that have really stuck with me:

favorite fics read in 2022

• backburner (enhypen, jaywon & heejay) – i've already said sm about this fic but truly miss lackadaisical has done it again <333 no one understands the jay park vision quite like her
• no soap radio (enhypen, heejay/wonki) & bestie vibes only (enhypen, jaywon/heeki) – love ao3 user linearity in general but i do think her most interesting stuff tends to be about niki… i can't tell if it's because i spend 0 time thinking about niki and she clearly spends way more time thinking about niki and therefore has very insightful things to write about him or because like. idk. but linearity do got me reading niki pov fic and enjoying it!
• various aideomai fics – i feel like whenever i'm depressed i just start rereading my favorite drarry fics. found these via fwcu and the reread value is honestly really high… i also just like it when harry is brown
• hand in unloveable hand (kinnporsche, vegas/pete) – yeah i had a very shortlived VEGASPETE phase except it's not actually shortlived except the issue is that 90% of their fic is just so awful… this is probably the only thing i feel ok about recommending to other people and i've read it a lot of times. idk i just like vegas whumpfic
• anything that touches (hockey rpf, sid/geno) – SPEAKING OF WHUMP this is probably the fic that destroyed me the most emotionally this year. like i was just full-on sobbing in bed because of it ummm it's just so delicately constructed and there are Layers to all of the interactions and it's just. KHJDJSHKGJKGK. i don't know what to say and i know the tags/content warnings seem suss but i swear it's a good fic please don't judge

HOBBIES (KNITTING)
i got into knitting during the middle of fall quarter and kind of… became obsessed with it? i live in the asian american theme dorm so i have to go to weekly presentations where i just sit there and listen to students talk about asian american issues and knitting became a good way for me to sit and listen but also… do things. i also love watching youtube and knitting things…i think i'm kind of over it (to an extent) but i also have yarn that i need to use up + i still need to attend those weekly presentations next quarter so i will likely be back at it! also shoutout crys for getting into knitting with me hehe

a brief rundown of what i've made:

• handwarmers x 5: yes i followed the same pattern five times LMAO… (made handwarmers for me and then 4 other friends) it's just so easy and mindless.
• followed a leg-warmer pattern but it ended up being much too big to actually be a legwarmer… i put it on my stuffed animal for a bit but later unraveled it to use in a different project
• handwarmers for my sister: slightly more complicated pattern with a thumb (!!) and different types of ribbing
• mittens for myself

the "simple" handwarmers i made for me and my friends

the failed attempt at a legwarmer; also my first time cabling

so yeah i haven't really been very original about my knitting endeavors. i kind of wanted to make leg-warmers but i'm not 100% sure if i have enough yarn for it in the color that i want it to be in… i also have a pound of light blue yarn so i think i might just start knitting a scarf or something next quarter. idk we'll see… i slowed down on knitting a lot because it started straining my wrists

HOBBIES ("SPEED"CUBING)
guys i'm such a flop cuber it isn't even funny!!! i did learn beginner method and then eventually "progressed" to cfop but i still don't have oll/pll memorized and also i'm lowkey slow and awkward at f2l sometimes… i do love my rubik's cube though and hopefully i will get everything down soon T__T i basically get random spurts of wanting to get better at it/will do it for an hour straight but then there are random days where i just won't touch my cube all day idk. also feliks zemdeg my ideal type i love babygirl quantbros + this is def a hobby i want to carry into 2023 also shoutout kaia for inspiring me to cube + troubleshooting my cubing struggles + showing me what cube to get

FITNESS
duude. I feel like this is the area where I have made the most progress <3 it's crazy to look back on the year and see how much things have changed.

for context, at the same time a year ago i basically didn't exercise regularly. i took two physical education classes my freshman fall quarter (one was on walking tho LOL) but didn't really do anything independently. i started going to the gym by myself around the end of january and honestly haven't looked back… it's one of the few consistent sources of joy for me this year lmao

i'm really proud of how far my numbers have come along this year! i started doing compound lifts at the end of march/beginning of april running the gzclp program and i've stuck mostly with that program ever since, sometimes flip-flopping with the thinner leaner stronger program when i need more variety >_<

my lifts:

• squat (started with 45lb, PR is 145lb for 3 reps)
• deadlift (started with 55lb, PR is 120lb for 3 reps but… idk… form stuff was getting weird)
• bench press (started with 40lb, PR is 65lb for 2 reps)
• overhead press (started with 30lb, PR is 55lb for 5 reps)

there are a couple things i want to focus on for next year and all of them are aligned around the theme of "balance"... idk if you can tell from above but i definitely spent more time on squats/bench press because i enjoy those lifts more! (ohp is just really frustrating sometimes because i progress so slowly, and then i had to troubleshoot my deadlift form like 3 different times oops) and anytime i go to the gym with my friends it becomes apparent that i am ummm not very flexible and lacking in certain areas (being able to touch my toes) T__T spending time with my sister at home also made me realize that i don't hate cardio the way i used to and that maybe i should work more cardio into my regular gym routine. the only L from this is that it means that i spend like 1.5 hrs at the gym instead of 1 hr but like… the things i should do for my overall heart health or whatever <3

right now with the new year i'm restarting my gzclp cycle with 80% of the max weight i was able to get to in the last cycle. i think starting over with slightly lower weights will definitely help me solidify my form… like ngl once i got to squatting 135 i feel like maintaining 100% perfect form became such a stressful ordeal for me. hopefully the things that i am adding to my gym routine can be maintained even when i'm busy with school >__< though tbh i've gotten to the point where if i don't go to the gym regularly i'll just be more unstable/moody than normal so.. yeah

goals:

• work more cardio into my routine so that i can meet the physician-recommended 150 min of cardio per week
• do more dumbbell accessories outside of compound lifts so that i can correct muscle imbalances LOL
• i'm going to try not to think as much about PRs and numbers this year but also i Do want to set some goals idk… T__T want to be able to bench 95 OHP 65 squat ??? (i don't have numbers in mind) and get my deadlift on the same level as my squat because women can usually biologically deadlift more than they squat but my deadlift is kind of weak compared to my squat rn
• be more intentional about being HIGH PROTEIN when at school (much easier to do at home unfortunately n__n)

BEAUTY
>> SKINCARE
*(@&%*( wow this year has been so frustrating skinwise! i was looking at photos of myself from last year around this time and it's kind of upsetting to see how clear my skin was n__n i'm not really sure what happened but basically… my skin has had its ups and downs.

roughly:

• march 2022 – started breaking out
• june 2022 – saw dermatologist, was prescribed minocycline (oral antibiotic) along with the usual tretinoin/clindamycin combination
• august 2022 – skin got better, phased out minocycline
• september 2022 – started breaking out AGAIN T__T
• december 2022 – saw dermatologist, was prescribed spironolactone (oral hormonal medication) along with azelaic acid to use along with usual tretinoin/clindamycin combination

sooo… yeah. the frustrating thing is that my mom was basically against using hormonal medication for the past ~4 years i've struggled with acne even though umm it literally do be caused by my hormones. i'm glad that she finally relented and it's crazy how fast my skin has calmed down within LITERALLY A WEEK of me starting spironolactone. i haven't started using the azelaic acid yet because my skin has been a little dry at home due to the incessant winter-time heating… i'm like a littleeee scared because i've never used other exfoliants along with tretinoin but also a part of me is like… i've been on tretinoin for the past 3-4 years and my skin is very used to it so hopefully if i add the azelaic acid to my routine slowly i won't overexfoliate!! i think tretinoin is great but it definitely doesn't address all of my skin concerns esp my texture issues n__n

my jolse order that i placed in november also finally arrived so i'm slowly phasing in products from that first:

• beauty of joseon sunscreen: umm as someone who has only used purito sun cream + nivea aqua sun gel before i did not realize that sunscreens could be this cosmetically elegant T__T i think it reduces my redness and it has such a good finish that's dewey without being too shiny/greasy!! i'm such a fan
• beauty of joseon glow deep serum: not to be an unbeliever in korean skincare (i am an unbeliever despite how much i spend at jolse) but i don't know if this will actually do anything for my skin… i wanted another hydrating layer + something that had brightening ingredients in it and this fit the bill though.

and everything else is just refills of stuff i already use so fingers crossed i'll add azelaic acid in like a week or two once i'm back at school… everything in due time i guess

i think one annoying thing about going to the gym is that i wash my face 3x a day. i tend to go to the gym in the middle of the day so my routine on gym days looks like this:

AM routine (pre-gym):

• wash face with water
• soon jung 10 free centella moist emulsion – very lightweight cream which is perfect for my taste, i really hate more heavy/occlusive lotions honestly
• beauty of joseon sunscreen – thoughts above! for the past year i was using nivea aqua sun gel which had more of an alcohol smell and also was a bit more shiny T_T

current AM routine (post-gym):

• double cleanse with hado labo gokujyun cleansing oil + cerave foaming facial cleanser… this shit is like the most boring combo alive but it gets the job done. i'm pretty sure i just buy the hado labo cleansing oil because i know it works for my skin and banila clean it zero is so much more expensive n__n
• cosrx advanced snail mucin power essence – my ride or die product i don't think i'll ever stop using this like *(#&@(*% it's just so insanely soothing and hydrating and perfect
• beauty of joseon glow deep serum
• clindamycin topical lotion – prescription topical lotion that i apply to the acne-prone areas of my face (i.e. cheeks/chin)
• if i feel particularly dry, i will add soon jung 10 free centella moist emulsion on top of everything but at school i usually don't need it
• beauty of joseon sunscreen

current PM routine:

• double cleanse again
• cosrx advanced snail mucin power essence
• tretinoin 0.05% – lowkey feel bad that i've been on this for so long because it's gotten to the point where i'm used to the speed of my skin regenerating (?) like i'm sure if i stopped this my skin would be so much worse but at this point i'm just used to pimples healing super fast and stuff due to this. unfortunately this doesn't really stop new things from forming it just speeds up the entire process
• soon jung 10 free centella moist emulsion

like idk i know it's not ideal to wash my face more than 2x a day but it's so constantly sunny where i go to school that i can't Not wear sunscreen (especially with my daily tretinoin use!) and whenever i wear sunscreen and sweat i need to make sure i wash it off properly so that my skin doesn't get fucked up even more &#($&@^ this is why i need two hydrating layers / order my skincare so that i have hydrating layers before applying tretinoin otherwise i deal with flakiness and stuff

>> MAKEUP
i'm looking at the last time i posted a skincare/makeup routine on dreamwidth and it's been like 1.5 years since then… i'm proud to say that i have gotten a bit better at makeup and don't just collect lip balms like a crazy person.

my current "full face" of makeup is…

• tarte shape tape concealer – i've used two $10 travel-sized bottles of this over the past 1.5 years and it's like… like i think it's fine but i'm starting to see its flaws. currently seeking concealer recs!! anyways i use this to conceal undereyes i used to use concealer for acne discoloration but i have since stopped giving a fuck :) i also blend everything out using a beauty blender that is damp with nyx dewy setting spray (thanks van for this hack lmao)
• lakme eyeconic liner pen fine tip – i used to use the nyx liquid liner for ages and then i switched to wet n wild but my mom brought this back from india for me and i like it soo much… felt tip liner is really so serious and i find it a lot easier to make a decent wing.
• essence lash princess mascara – cult favorite best selling $5 mascara on ulta etc etc. this does the job i don't think it gives me the dramatic falsie look that others talk about but i don't really need that
• nyx tinted brow mascara – i use this but i don't even know how much of a difference it makes… it is weirdly psychologically comforting to comb my eyebrow hairs though
• glossier cloud paint in beam and puff – puff is this barbie light pink color that i'm not superrr into but beam is like the perfect natural warm-toned blush for me <3 very buildable and natural looking and easy to work with! as someone who gravitates to wearing cooler colors and finds cool pinks really pretty, it took a while for me to realize that coral tones are actually really flattering on my skin…
• colorpop super shock highlighter in flexitarian – this highlighter is so intensely pigmented and i love it to death… a little goes a long way

but usually for school i'll just do the first four steps or just steps #3 and #4. i really try to avoid putting makeup on my cheeks because that's where i break out the most. oh and i use the innisfree no sebum powder like every other girl cuz… i get oily easily

after that it's kind of a mixed bag what'll happen. the current lip products i have in rotation rn include:

• rom&nd juicy lasting tint in almond rose, nucadamia, and jujube – GUYS THESE TINTS ARE TRULY SO GOOD <3 and i feel insane for having 3 now but i do feel like each has its own vibe/purpose/niche… maybe that's me just justifying my spending habits though. nucadamia is a MLBB shade for me and it's definitely the most subtle of the three – i can actually see myself wearing this on a daily basis. jujube is way more red and dramatic but i think it suits special occasions and i like how warm and flattering it is. finally almond rose is kind of in between these shades and it's also a bit more pink and girly… idk
• idk why but i have the nyx butter gloss!! and it lasts maybe 3 seconds on my lips on average but it also smells so good… lip gloss rlly do be one of the most useless makeup products ever but i still love it
• lucas' papaw ointment – not me still owning the jake shim whats in my bag recommended lip balm T__T this is basically the only lip balm i use rn, i used to rotate with the laniege lip glowy balm but i think it got old or something. i don't think it's as good as my favoritest lip balm of ever (kiehl's lip balm #1 mango) but i kind of want to use it up and i like how neutral it is

anyways in terms of improvements/things i've been thinking about wrt improving my makeup routine…

• i need to get a new concealer!!! currently considering nars radiant creamy concealer or the hourglass vanish airbrush concealer. i know that kosas is also kind of trending right now but i'm scared about their lack of preservatives or whatever. PLEASE HMU WITH RECS <3
• i kind of wish i had light coverage base makeup but i don't even know where to get started and also i'm probably going to wait for my skin to get better before even thinking about stuff like that
• i'm not super satisfied with my eyebrows but as a south asian woman i don't really have issues with needing to Fill In my eyebrows or anything. honestly my problem (having one eyebrow that is a little sparser than the other) just stems from the fact that i don't get my eyebrows done/threaded but also adding that instant yearly +$300 surcharge to my life for maintenance of eyebrows makes me want to die.
• i bought the laniege lip mask from jolse because it was on sale so i guess i'll see if it's as good as what the people are saying

>> HAIR
i love my hair sm i'm not even going to lie… like yes spending $350 a year on a balayage might be ridiculous but it feels worth it to me! it's also nice to see how light my hair can get even without using any bleach. i might consider going for bleach next time but idk how light i even want to go like the medium brown to dark brown gradient that i have going on rn is pretty satisfying <3 idk why i'm including this section when i literally do nothing for my hair but i guess i wanted to make my stance as a pureology/redken believer known… i was using the native shampoo/conditioner combo during fall quarter because i left my expensive shampoo/conditioner at home and returning to my og products is actually making such a difference!!

one thing i want to do differently compared to last year is to actually have a decent attempt at growing my hair out. last year as soon as my hair grew past my shoulders it always got so hard to untangle and was just a struggle to manage so i chopped it off but idk… i want to try having a bit longer for once T__T i've been getting into the habit of braiding my hair before going to help and it's actually making a big impact on my hair <33

anyways some miscellaneous stuff:

• currently using the redken all soft shampoo and pureology smooth perfection conditioner (used to have both the shampoo and conditioner for pureology but i ran out of the shampoo first)
• i'm probably going to replace the pureology conditioner with the redken one when i run out!
• umm does anyone have any insight on hair masks + scalp exfoliation? i feel like the ends of my hair that have been through a balayage twice are a little drier than normal…

MONEY/BUDGETING
guys i need help/advice T__T i don't really spend outside of my means but i do wonder if i should/could be saving more money lmao. (my parents: "why do u spend as much as u make per month" UMM) i have a credit card (discover student) and pay it off every month but outside of that im like should i try and "budget" more like WHAT SHOULD I DO to get better at money management? i also feel like i am negatively influenced by some of my peers who have (or are soon to have) a lot of tech/quant internship money and *@(&% it's so harrowing.

also i don't really keep track of frequent flyer stuff and things which i know is an L because i fly around so much for school… would u guys recommend always booking from the same airline to accumulate points

OVERALL THOUGHTS
guys i'm so sorry for this really long post i think i was just trying to combine like 3 different dreamwidth posts into one post. like i was considering adding my tea/drinks roundup to this too before realizing that maybe i should just stfu for once <3 i was going to do some list rankings to round everything else out the way crys did but i don't even know what to say… actually i do have some things.

favorite drinks i've had this year:

1. kona coffee coconut matcha latte with oat milk and light ice
2. xing fu tang taro boba milk tea
3. sunright tea studio ceylon milk tea 25% sugar no ice
4. coffeebar lavender matcha latte with oat milk (hot)
5. teazzi house special milk tea with oats and boba

favorite kpop (that i discovered this year):

1. hype boy – new jeans
2. island – youha
3. illusion – aespa

actually i just realized that if i kept going with this my horrible taste would be revealed further. maybe i should just get into my 2023 goals…

ACADEMICS:

• stop getting B's in classes: pretty self explanatory, i genuinely never want this to happen to me again
• figure out if i'm going to double major in CS or get a masters instead: i thought it was pretty set that i would get a masters in CS because it has more flexibility but my sister was like If You Apply To Grad School Don't Do This so now i'm doubting myself again T_T
• figure out studying abroad/if i actually want to do it: yeah i'm pretty torn about this… part of this is because i am committed to learning (technical) things and there are not very many stem options for studying abroad. and the other part is like idk how much i care about any of the countries that my school has a program with…

i have other goals but i feel like they seem so dumb lol. like i really want to be done with 2024 internship recruiting before fall quarter 2023 but i don't even know if this summer will make me want to pivot careers drastically or something… so i guess it's too soon to say anything about anything T__T

HEALTH:

• gym regularly (3-4x a week)
• cardio regularly (150 min of moderate activity a week)
• take my multivitamins every day: my mom reminds me about this every day at home and i really should do this at school as well!
• reevaluate how often i should be drinking: yeah i don't exactly know what concrete goal to set here… i drank a lot less last semester and i think it was good for me but it's also like. i still drank around every two weeks (?) part of me is like Should I Do Dry January but also january is the beginning of the quarter/when i have the least amount of academic responsibilities so… maybe i should do dry february or something. sorry i know this isn't that deep but i think i want to understand (1) just how bad alcohol is for my brain function, sleep quality, overall health and then (2) set reasonable limits on alcohol consumption accordingly. yes this is coming from the same person who just ordered a fake id for being in chicago over the summer

MONEY:

• figure out how to put internship money in stocks or whatever: pretty sure it shouldn't just be sitting in my bank account like that and i don't want to tempt myself into spending it on things
• figure out budgeting/spending limits/tracking expenses…???

MEDIA CONSUMPTION:

• read 20 books: this should be doable i think. 2022 is probably the year i've read the least # of books since like… idk… before I learned how to read? however i do think it will be difficult to
• read 15 NON GRAPHIC NOVEL books: like yeah i love graphic novels but i think i need to start reading real books too T__T

and then i think overall i am hoping that i will be more comfortable with myself in the coming year. i think i'm already more confident than i was a year ago but still i have moments of insecurity and it's pretty harrowing. 2022 definitely had its ups and downs but overall i'll say it was leagues better than 2021 T__T hoping that this coming year will be ok for all of us!! also im gonna try to be better at replying to dw commnets oops

also wanted to add that i'm really grateful for all of u guys especially those of you that i've been able to meet up with in person. like my year would def not be the same without being able to see miss kaia for the first time in years, kaialice hosting me in their apartment, van also hosting me in her apartment during the enha concert, emily picking me up in chicago + bringing me to dinner, and ofc the countless times i've coordinated meeting up with crys during my random nyc trips. so excited to hang out with u guys more next year <333